Tuesday, September 29, 2009

The Chronicles of Dating: Advice for Guys Ammendment #1

I always knew that list of 10 things for guys not to do was completely inadequate. Why? Because guys continue to do stupid thing when dating. And so, amendments must be made. Call it a Bill of Rights, if you will...things that guys have the right to choose not to do, and therefore free themselves from being douches.

So here it is, amendment #1:

Do not contact a girl you have taken out to get the number of her friend to take said friend out.
And, on a similar enough note to lump it under the same amendment, do not think that forgoing the contacting part and just asking the friend out is okay either (you know who you are).

Seriously, what in heaven's name are guys thinking when they decide this is a good idea? I mean, even if you didn't hit it off with girl #1, there is a certain thing called tact that you should learn to employ.

More Killers (I know, I know)

Just adding some photos of all of us at the concert!

Oh, and Jordan playing ping-pong with Brandon Flowers!

Ted and The Killers

If you read my last post, you will know that I have a little bit of an obsession with a band called

and certain members thereof. And you will also know that I got the chance to go to their concert the other night, and hobnob at the after party, and watch my friend, Ted, play "Losing Touch" with them onstage. You may also know that I haven't calmed down about it yet.

Well I don't need to calm down!

No need here. Why? Because Jordan just posted a video (seen below) of Ted playing a totally KILLER (pun intended, and you better appreciate it) guitar solo with The Killers.

Take note of the awesomeness. Take note of the spotlight. Take note of the raising of the roof. Take note of the Rockstar hug. AND TAKE NOTE THAT I WAS FREAKING THERE!

Sunday, September 27, 2009

Holy Crap, The Killers!

That's right folks, I went to The Killers concert last night. And I didn't just go...I got comped a ticket by a Killer himself.

Who knows a rockstar?

I know a rockstar!

My coworker, Ted, totally rocks it with The Killers and gave all us O-stockers the in. AND IT WAS AWESOME!

Here's a picture I took at the show:

Okay, that's not my picture. But this one is:

Ha ha. I promise I could see far more of the stage than what the silly little camera on my phone caught.

So the night was incredible. Not only did I get to see one of my favorite bands rock it live with lots confetti and fire, but I also got to see my friend rip it up on stage with them! I tried getting a picture, but you already saw my phone's inadequate photo abilities, so I stole this picture off Ted's facebook (hope it's okay, Ted):


And the fun doesn't stop there. We all got to go to the after party and hobnob with - or more like near - The Killers themselves. That's right, I have been in the same room as real-life rockstars.

And so now I leave you with one of my favorite Killers songs. Enjoy!

Thursday, September 24, 2009

10 Things I Hate About What You Say

These are all things that people say a lot, and they are all things that need to stop, immediately.

So here they are, in no particular order (just because I hate them all equally and could therefore not rate them).

10. "lol," "rofl," "lmao," and all other chat/internet/text lingo. Only exception to the rule: lolcats.

9. "FAIL," which is also, technically, internet lingo, but it's popping up everywhere, and makes anyone who uses it sound like a caveman.

8. "More Cowbell." Yes, the skit was funny; we all laughed. But it's not funny when you say it, and even less funny when you say it repeatedly, and even less funny when you yell it everytime you hear "Don't Fear the Reaper," and way less funny when you yell it out while listening to other songs that have nothing to do with the skit, and by far, the rock-bottom of un-funnyness when you wear it on a t-shirt.

7. Calling t-shirts, like the above-mentioned "More Cowbell" t-shirt, "ironic t-shirts." Maybe I'm missing something, but I'm totally missing the irony (so I am missing something). What is ironic about that? Nothing! And even worse: the "ironic fedora." What in heaven's name is ironic about wearing a fedora? It's not like rain on your wedding day or anything!

6. "Baby bump." This one should be self-explanatory.

5. "Frenemy," "staycation," "Brangelina," and all other portmanteaus.

4. "BFF." I really think I just have problems with acronyms in general.

3. Using the term, "legit," when not actually replacing it for the word, "legitimate." Legit does not mean cool, guys.

2. "I'm kind of a big deal." Just reference what I said about "More Cowbell," and apply all reasons to stop saying that to this.

1. "I think I just threw up in my mouth a little bit." Seriously, just stop saying this.

Tuesday, September 22, 2009

A Day for Remembering

Nothing fancy, nothing complicated. Today I am just remembering. I'm remembering my Aunt, Henrike, and my cousin, Michael.

My aunt, Henrike, passed away several years ago. Today would have been her birthday - today is her birthday-and she would have been 65.

My cousin, Michael, passed away one year ago today, on our aunt's birthday. Sadly, his life was taken, and all we can do today is remember him.

So that is what I am doing today. This post, I know, is far more solemn and serious than usual, and perhaps even short and straight-forward. But at times like this, I feel that flowery words and run-around language do not enhance, or suppress, any emotions. It's just extra flack. What I cling on to is remembering those I've lost and knowing that they aren't really lost - they've been here all along.

Thursday, September 17, 2009

31 Days of Halloween

So I wrote about this on my Halloween blog, but I am doing a new, fantastic, amazing thing called:


I am going to do something Halloween-oriented every single day in October! Why? Because the only thing I love more than unicorns is HALLOWEEN.

And sometimes, you can have them both.

So, check out my other blog to see what I already have in store for myself, and please, please, if you have any other awesome ideas, let me know! I have 31 whole days to fill!

hApPy HaLlOwEeN!

Thursday, September 10, 2009

Sea Unicorns

Sea Kittens? They should be sea unicorns! But luckily, PETA kept that in mind....

Sea kittens look extra magical and cuddly with a pretty unicorn horn! The tutu and tiara help a lot too.


Last night I saw the movie,


(yes, on 9-9-09, at 10:09 pm).

First of all, I'm going to have
nightmares about this...

...and this

and especially this:

And there's plenty of other weird creepiness like, hello terrifying baby doll!

But all-in-all, the movie was amazing. I just want to squeeze those cute little burlap dollies, though I doubt they'd like it much.

And, as you very well may already know, the full-length movie was an extension of a previous short. I watched it today, and find it equally entertaining, though not as involved as the film. But sometimes that's a good thing.

Thursday, September 3, 2009

If it Only Had a Unicorn...

...this cardigan would be the coolest thing I've ever seen. But as is, it is getting pretty close!

Wednesday, September 2, 2009

The Chronicles of Dating: Installment #7 - Bad Luck Chuck

This may be my worst date story ever, but there is serious competition pending with about 15 other dating stories. However, the cringe-worthy-ness of this date is seriously, well, cringe-worthy.

Let me preface this story with a small tad of information: several months after the date, I ran into the guy at a costume party. I had kind-of forgotten what he looked like until that point, and now all memories of him are in a purple turban. So, when I remember this date, I remember him wearing said purple turban.

Also, let me preface this by saying that I am continually baffled by people from Davis and/or Utah county who are completely unfamiliar with Salt Lake City. I mean, it is our state capital and within extremely reasonable driving distance from both counties. And let's face it, it's one of the only non-stale parts of our lovely state. How can someone be SO unfamiliar with the city that they can't find their way around our 7th grade math class grid system?

That being said, my date was from the oh-so-popular city of Provo, and was therefore completely unfamiliar with the oh-so-un-icky city of Salt Lake.

So, when he told me to meet him at the movie theater (he obviously didn't read points of advice #5 and #2), I spent a good 40+ minutes sitting at the theater, endlessly repeating directions over the phone for how to get to State Street and 9000 South from I-15.

Oh, and did I mention that this was at about 10 pm on a Monday night? Perfect time for a date, right?

Once he finally arrived at the theater, we had about a half an hour to wait for our movie to start. To fill up the time, he informed me that he was starving and needed to eat. I was a tad hungry myself. We sauntered up to the concession counter where he proceeded to order for himself and then pay for his food, and just his food. The more tact-informed cashier asked if there was anything else he wanted to get, giving him a look. "Nope, this is plenty for me," was my date's reply.

Hello most egregious ignorance of point of advice #3 ever!

So there I sat, watching him eat, hearing him eat, trying to make conversation past the gobs of pizza rolling around in his mouth.

Finally, that pain over, we continued onward with our date and gave the ticket guy our tickets for what I thought was an innocent romantic comedy. This movie is not an innocent romantic comedy:

Plus Dane Cook? Ick to the infinite power!

And so there I sat, watching soft porn that's been left on the counter until it got a little crusty and a little dried out with a guy who had struck out hours before. And here comes the best part: since it was, once again, 10pm on a Monday night, we were the only people in the theater - watching Dane Cook fake film-hump upwards of 100 naked women. And my date was wearing a purple turban.